Things You Should Not Do At An Interview

GD/PI June 16th, 2008

Do Not Imitate TV Ads

Advertisements these days have the zaniest of scenarios. When asked about hobbies do not say, crocodile hunting, river rafting … you get my drift. No, there’s no one to slap you, like that car ad, I admit. But if your boss invites you to go sky diving with him after you land the job, you might very well get trapped. If asked where you see yourself five years from now, do not delude yourself into thinking that pretty secretary will be sitting by your side and you’ll be doing the interviewing then on. Shucks, such things happen only in Bacardi ads. And no, that Nokia phone will not land you the job, as promised. But surely you already knew that. All advertisements must come with statutory warnings about such stunts, no?

Do Not Forget ‘Silent Mode’ on Cell phones
In the highly unlikely circumstances, that you are technology-impaired, please familiarise yourself with your cell phone’s silent mode… It’s no rocket science, really. If you still can’t find it, swallow your pride and bile and ask your friend. Imagine a scenario where your interviewer is asking you about your long term goals and your mobile phone plays “Dhoom”. Not a good scene. Be fair. Imagine if you were right in the middle of telling them why they should give you the job and the interviewer’s phone rings. Makes you forget your practiced lines, no? Don’t feel bad, once you have the job you can flash that mp3 enabled-polyphonic gadget in everyone’s face.

Do Not Over-Accessorise

Oh, so you have an eyebrow piercing. Very nice. Did you say a tongue piercing too? I love how your nose ring matches your lip stud. But you wouldn’t want to flash them at an interview. Oh yes, its all very well to say, “Man! That’s so retro-like” But you know what, the odds are that man on the panel has just finished rowing with his teenage son over that new piercing. Or worse, one of ‘em panellists had a piercing himself that he had to take off for his interview. Either way, the situation looks not-so-rosy. When you talk, you want them to hear you, not look fancifully at that stud flitting in and out of your mouth. So the next rule: No piercings. Yes ladies, you can wear one pair of earrings

Do Not Be Stupid.

I know that’s like a, do-not-forget-to-wear-your-pants instruction. Painfully redundant. But just so you don’t forget.
· Never take your ipod to the interview room
· Don’t smoke before interview. The tobacco smell is stronger than you think.
· Do not chew gum. You’d look like a ruminating cow.
· Do not ask too many questions. Remember who is the interviewee? That’s right, YOU!
· Do not keep glancing at watch. Even if it is a Swatch Skin, its not legitimate reason enough. They’d think there’s some other place, you’d rather be.
· Do not ogle at the interviewer’s secretary. When you are boss, you can get your own.
· You and the interviewer are NOT on first-name-basis.
· Do not sing or dance to demonstrate talent.
· Do not demand to know the interviewer’s salary.